Editor’s note: This poem fuses together multiple stories heard over a 10 year period of those who have left the church. It stands as a window into the reasons young families give for leaving and does not reflect any one church or one congregation.
By Jonathan David Faulkner
We are the Family who left
Do you remember us?
We came for a month
Sat fourth row from the back?
In that time many people said “Welcome”
But were we welcomed?
Like that first Sunday we came
My wife and four kids
We piled in the pew and sang the songs
We enjoyed the sermon
About how Christ’s love transforms us
The peace was passed, so was the plate
Do you remember that date?
Trouble started from the time we entered
The very people who shook our hands
Sat in the pews sparring sideways glances
Because my wife was wearing shorts
And my sons hair looked a little unkept
You shook hands and said “Glad you’re here”
Then you gossiped about what we wear
We had been told by our friends about the judgment
Past members who had left for the same reason
Who had had the same experiences
Who were no longer even Christians
Because of the way you treated them
You wanted the sound of children’s feet
But you wounded the heart that within them beat
We tried to talk to the Pastor
He was all about how we could get involved
But we had concerns and we needed resolved
They were brushed off as “just how it is”
When the Bible says it is to be different
So many hurt by the church with regrets
1 in 3 saying the church is full of hypocrites
But no one wants to address this
No one wants to admit these sins
And so another sister is abused
Another brother is demeaned
This has nothing to do with being “woke”
But everything to do with the words Jesus spoke
If you want to reach the lost
Then you have to start paying the cost
Comfort has become your idol
And you sit in your zones idle
Gossip and slander come from your lips
While you try to give unwanted parenting tips
How long oh Lord,
Will you forget the wounded forever
How long Oh lord, will the young girl cry
While the teenage boy ponders suicide
How long until the word of God is proclaimed
It seems day after day it is profaned
By Church people
The very ones who claim your name
How long oh Lord
Will you leave us stranded here
I see my sisters and brothers floating in the wreckage
We reach for each other and pull each other to safety
Meanwhile the evil doer goes unpunished
The wicked prosper in your church
And we just leave it hurt.
We are the Family who left
Do you remember us?
We came for a month
Sat fourth row from the back?
In that time many people said “Welcome”
But were we not welcomed.